


Painted on My Heart

by Nell (twistedgeekgirl)



Series: The Broken Road Home [3]
Category: Hockey RPF
Genre: Emotional/Psychological Abuse, Homophobic Language, M/M, emotionally abusive relationship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-03-13
Updated: 2014-03-13
Packaged: 2018-01-15 15:16:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,830
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1309516
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/twistedgeekgirl/pseuds/Nell
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The truth about Johnny's perfect life is that Johnny's life is no where near perfect.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Painted on My Heart

**Author's Note:**

> ** UPDATE ** Fixed minor continuance issue. Johnny has a giant hickey on his neck, she would have seen it. And would have definitely said something about it.

Johnny's drunk by the time he makes it onto the plane. So drunk that he doesn’t even care that people had taken pictures of him stumbling his way onto the plane. He just doesn't fucking care. 

Patrick.

His wife Jane is waiting, stone faced and hot eyed for him at the airport. Johnny knows he's screwed. But for the first time in his life, he just doesn't care what the proper responsible thing to do is. He knew his marriage was over the moment he called Patrick. Maybe he should have just ended it there. Just told her it was over and left and never come back. 

He's still drunk by the time they make it to their home. It's been their home, their piece of perfect for the last two years. Yet, all he can think of is how it's nothing more than a prison. He's trapped, he's been trapped, but it's been a prison of his own making. He knows it, knows he only has himself to blame. He's the one to blame for everything. 

Jane hasn't said a word to him. Not a 'hello', an 'I missed you' not even a 'fuck you.' He knows the last one's coming. Knows a lot worse than that is coming. He's counting down the moments until explosion. Funny thing is Jane had a lot more to be angry about than what she's boiling about now. He hadn't called her when he'd gotten in, hadn’t called her or answered any of her calls or texts the whole time he was with Patrick. 

Patrick. 

Johnny makes his way into the house, knowing that the inevitable is coming. That the end is edging near. He want's it, want's it so bad he can almost taste it. He wants the fight, he wants the angry words and the hatred from her. He needs it. 

"How is Patrick?" She asks, spitting out Patrick's name like its poison on her tongue. She's standing arms spread on the kitchen counter. She's ready to fight and this time, Johnny's ready to fight back.

"I think he got his closure." Johnny answers honestly, tone flippant. Her eyes go wide, Johnny doesn’t know quite what she's taking from his words but he isn't going to lie anymore. He's done with all of it. He's lost Patrick, what the fuck does he care about anything else. 

"Gotten his closure?" She asks, face twisting up disgusted. "What did the little fag have a thing for you?" 

"I told you to never fucking call him that." Johnny spits back. The only time in their marriage where they'd had harsh words or even fought had been just after Patrick had publicly came out. 

Jane steps back arms crossing over her chest. "Why didn’t you call John? Better yet, why didn’t you answer my calls?" She asks, her voice holding tightly controlled rage. 

"I was busy." Johnny answers shrugging. He knows he could, and maybe even should be handling this better but he just can't bring himself to care. 

"Busy?" She yells, flinging her arms out. "Busy what? Busy getting that hickey?"

"Yes busy." He yells right back. For a moment she looks shocked, Johnny has never yelled at her. He's never lied to her. Never been anything but calm, cool, and polite. Except when it's been about Patrick. "Look, I need a shower." He says, suddenly not wanting to deal with it. He just want's it all over. 

"No John, we need to talk about this. Where did you get that hickey?" She says, blocking his way out of the kitchen. 

"I think you know where I got the hickey Jane." Johnny says, tone even and cold.

"Where did you get the hickey John?" She screams at him shoving her way into his space.

"Where do you think I got it from Jane?" Johnny asks, sighing. He's so done with this conversation already. 

"So you're a fucking fag too now?" She growls shoving him.

"You know what." Johnny says, gearing himself up. Somewhere in the back of his head he knows this isn't the right way to do this. That he's being a horrible person, but he just doesn’t care. Pulling out his phone he dials his lawyer. 

"Who are you calling?" She asks, almost shrieking at him. She puts up a decent fight trying to pull his phone out of his hands but he's got almost two feet on her and at least 150 lbs. of muscle. He thumbs the phone onto speaker. 

"Berringer and Associates." A woman's voice answers. Jane's eyes go wide and furious. 

"Yes, this is Jonathan Towes, can you please tell Mr. Berringer that I need to speak with him." Johnny says holding the phone out of his wife's reach. 

"Just a moment Sir." The woman says, the line cutting to instrumental music.

"You bastard, what do you think your doing?" Jane growls at him, nostrils flaring. 

"Filing for divorce." Johnny answers tiredly. 

"Fuck you." She spits out, shoving away from him and heading off somewhere in the house. Johnny hears banging and crashing from somewhere but he can't really find the whit to care.

"Hello, Mr. Toews, how can I help you?" Mr. Berringer asks, cheerfully.

"Hi, well to start with, I'd like to draw up divorce papers. I want it done as quickly as possible. Give her the house, the full alimony settlement, the car, any thing of hers. I just want it done." Johnny says wincing as another crash comes from somewhere above his head. 

"Well, you know what you want huh? But are you sure? I mean it's not my place, and you seem pretty set about it but we can probably get away with just the settlement amount. You did sign a prenup." The lawyer says. 

"Nope. I don’t want it. I don’t want any of it. I just want to be done." Johnny says, sighing. 

"You're seriously going to deplete your capital, it will leave you almost broke." Mr. Berringer says, looking over Johnny's holdings on his computer. 

"I don’t care if I have to sleep on someone's couch for the next year, I just want it done." Johnny says. Watching as Jane storms back into the kitchen her face red and splotchy. 

"Well, we'll make this happen, I'll have the papers drawn up and delivered by tomorrow." Mr Berringer says. Jane narrows her eyes to slits. 

"Thank you. Good day." Johnny says ending the call. Watching as Jane opens her mouth once then snaps it closed, her mouth twisting in disgust. 

"So you're a fucking fag too?" Jane asks after a moment. 

"Jane I don’t want to do this with you. Just sign the papers tomorrow. I gave you the house, your car, the full settlement, I just want to be done." Johnny says pocketing his phone. 

Jane stands there face still red. "I want more." Jane says, cocking her hip to the side. 

"Well you're not getting it. You signed a prenup. I don’t have to give you anything more than the settlement." Johnny says reaching into the cabinet for a glass. Filling it with water, he drinks it down.

"I'm calling my lawyer!" She screams bounding back off into another room. 

Johnny pulls his phone back out of his pocket. He does a search for a moving service. Calls the first one he sees, they tell him they'll be there first thing in the morning. He counter offers with double the cost if they can be here today. As soon as possible. The woman puts him on hold for a moment. 

"That can be arranged." She says. He gives his address, and credit card information and hangs up. 

He heads off upstairs to see exactly what belonging she's destroyed this time. 

He heads off to his room first knowing most of the damage will be there. After all it's really the only place in the whole house he has anything. For a moment he's shocked. He's blown away. But he knows, maybe he deserved this. Pictures lay smashed against the floors, his trophy's and medals lay on the ground, some broken others just there. Part of him is sad, the other part doesn’t feel anything. 

He leaves the room and starts rounding up the rest of his stuff dropping it off into the one room in the house he'd ever had any say. He spends the rest of the time waiting for the movers freezing his accounts. Calling the bank he has a very long conversation with the bank manager about removing his name from their joint account and pulling her access to the rest of his accounts. After that’s taken care of, he freezes her credit cards. No one could ever accuse him of being caught with his pants down. 

He hears the door bell and doesn’t quite run to answer it, but its close. After a quick conversation and maybe some bribery to get his stuff moved as quickly as possible They head upstairs, boxes and packing tape in tow. Jane comes out of their bedroom throwing an arm full of his stuff at him. It had been the only room he hadn't been able to clean out. 

"Good! Get the fuck out." She yells as she makes continuous trips into the room and throwing stuff back out into the hall. 

"Well, this stuff and the stuff in this room." He gestures to the open doorway. The movers give him a sympathetic look. 

"You want everything?" The lead guys asks him. 

"Yeah even the broken stuff, if you want just put all the broken shit into their own boxes. I really don’t care how its packed. I just want out." Johnny says, not even caring enough to be embarrassed. 

"Alright guys, lets get to it." The guy in charge Tom says, giving Johnny another pitying look. Three hours later and a screaming match Johnny knows is going to be put on youtube later, most of if not all of his belongings are out of the house and loaded into a moving van. 

"Thank you guys. I know its late and you probably have families. I appreciate it." Johnny says as they're all standing in the drive way by the van. He hands each guy $200 dollars and shakes their hands. "I'd give you more, but it's all the cash I have at the moment." He says sheepish. 

"So where is the truck going?" Tom asks, after the other guys have left and it's only Tom, the driver and Johnny. 

"Ultimately Chicago. But for tonight I have no fucking clue." He says embarrassed. 

"Right then, for tonight well take it to the lot and lock it up, call the office tomorrow when you've got things sorted out." Tom says shaking hands one final time with Johnny. 

"Thanks." Johnny says, then turns to climb into his own car. Looking up at his house one last time he pulls out of the driveway. Feeling free for the first time in years.

**Author's Note:**

> I know Johnny's out of character, but in here he's been living with someone who little by little took control of every aspect of his life. That’s why at the beginning of Miss your Misery, he did everything his wife told him. Why he was so out of sorts and desperate when he begged Patrick to come let him visit. Why he lost absolute control of himself and all but attacked Patrick in the garage. For the first time in years he felt in control. He abused that control by treating Patrick that way. But he was starved for everything. All he had left was hockey. He'd been so under Jane's thumb that he'd kept Patrick out of his life because he didn’t want to Patrick to have to see him like that or deal with her. 
> 
> When he lost Patrick at the end of Miss your Misery something in him snapped back into place. It's why he just rolled over and gave her everything he wants out he wants done. He knows that the longer he stays, the more likely he is to stay with her. It's why it's so important to him to get out as quickly as possible. Before he loses his nerve.


End file.
